Lots of words get tossed around these days …gratitude …mindfulness …presence. And they’re all great things to include in your life. No doubt.
But as a concept, they can be slippery, and they definitely mean different things to different people.
I thought I’d share what I’m experimenting with lately in this regard — I’ve been offering my appreciation for work done, for admirable qualities someone shows, for some specific thing someone did, stuff like that.
Pretty basic, I know, but how often do you make the effort to give an authentic, substantive compliment?
Sure, it’s fun to receive them ahem…hello, I’m listening…. But little did I know how rewarding it is to give compliments. I ran around after the Ten Minute Play Fest and told as many people as I could (I didn’t get to everyone, so don’t be mad if you didn’t hear from me!) what I enjoyed about their work, acting, writing, singing, whatever. It was a blast!
Yes, sometimes after an offer, people don’t respond how you’d hope, or at all *cue the crickets* and I won’t lie, that’s a bummer. But most people have been grateful and seem touched.
It’s ultimately a win-win especially when they want to buy you a beer, too.
So when you feel kinda blah, think of something cool someone did and tell them what you think.
You may make their day, and yours.
And the next thing you know, you’ll constantly be on the lookout for good things and stealthily slipping in compliments during normal conversations with random people, and everyone’s feeling fine.
Kinda like a living, breathing “Like” button…but with sincerity and effort (beyond a click) that others will appreciate.
Try it. You might like it.
LOVE THIS, Wendy, and couldn’t agree more. Something I started several months ago is to acknowledge coworkers for something great they’ve done, or to just tell them how wonderful I think they are. Inevitably, they respond with, “Wow, where did THAT come from?” or, if they’re feelin’ spicy, “OK, what do you need?”
It’s just a fun, fun thing to do and it fills up my cup to do it.
Melisa @ just begin from here.´s last [type] ..just when you thought it was safe to read my blog.
That’s cool, Melisa! Good for you! Isn’t it funny how people don’t know what to do with praise, like a heartfelt positive comment?! Definitely cup-filling!
Well, said! It is amazing what a kind word can do for someone. I always make a point of telling someone if I like what they’re wearing, or their hair, etc. Even total strangers. #1 I don’t want them to think I’m some weird staring at them and #2 I think of how much it would mean to me if someone did the same for me. And I try to remember to compliment those that I know on their work, home, kids, how they handled a situation – whatever. It really does make a big difference. And maybe they’ll pay it forward.
Trish´s last [type] ..Comparison
Yes, true, Trish! I’ve seen the hubs compliment strangers for that very reason, to boost someone up, or maybe make their day, but it’s a mind shift to me to think about taking action after having a positive thought about someone and actually VOICE it. Feels good. Great that you are in practice! It’s good role modeling, too, for kids and adults.
This reminds me of when, back in the day of raising kids, trying to “catch them being good” and comment on that. This also paid off while teaching school. Remembering to do this with adults takes some self-reminding!
Yes, it doesn’t seem to come naturally. At least, at first but then it shifts a little.