We had another conversation here at chez Let the dog in! illustrating the differences between the Hubs and yours truly’s marriage and others’ wedded bliss. It all came up after I went shoe shopping with a friend.
She bought some super cute (waterproof! yay!) boots but wanted to know the store’s returns policy.
In case her husband didn’t like them.
HUH?
If I came home with boots I was feeling da love for and the Hubs made a funny face or said, hmmmmm, not great, I’d say, “You don’t know shit about fashion, you dirtwad how great they feel!”
I came by this bitchiness attitude honestly, I can tell you. We haven’t discussed this issue, but I can already hear my mother’s retort: “In case he didn’t like them?? What, is he going to be wearing them?”
This concept of actually giving a shit caring what your spouse thinks, well, it’s as foreign to me as mayonnaise and peanut butter sandwiches (Just because they are good separately, doesn’t mean you get to do this! You know who you are!). It’s like those Facebook friends who claim to hold hands with their spouses at home, when no one is looking.
In what alternative universe is this stuff happening? Next, you’ll tell me married couples are also knitting together or taking dance classes voluntarily.
It’s just difficult for me to believe that all of ya’ll in Texas, where I was raised, would ever cotton to such shenanigans.
But a tiny yes-virginia-there-is-a-santa part of me realized last night, that those wives live each day knowing what their husband’s honest opinion is on any given topic. They offer understanding and respect to the person they’re spending the rest of their life with.
Someone must be speaking their thoughts and feelings out loud, and someone must be listening.
In our 8 years of marriage, this is a strategy I haven’t really tried before, hearing and honoring his words. Hmmmmmm, I bet that’d make him feel good, needed, validated, and whatever else Oprah’s discussing.
And when someone feels like that, well, they return that gift of giving, don’t they?
Maybe then he’d buy me some new boots!
Okay, readers, raise your hand if you want your husband’s honest opinion on your fashion choices!
Come join the Let the dog in! gang on Facebook and Twitter!!
Post Footer automatically generated by Add Post Footer Plugin for wordpress.
I rely on my husband’s opinion because after all, he knows my body better than anyone else! Besides, now that I’m married, I’m dressing to impress only one man now, so I mights as well make sure he likes what he sees.
That being said, I also have a strong sense of myself and my own fashion, and do on occasion tell him he’s full of shit. He tends to be afraid of anything super trendy, so I do sometime wear things despite his dislike of it. After all, I have to feel confident in myself, regardless of what he thinks. But at the same time, he’s seen me in everything in my wardrobe at every stage of dressiness, and really knows what looks good on me. So of course I’d take his opinion!
(PS, yes, we do hold hands at home. So do my parents.)
Oh I agree with you, Wendy! I never ask my husband for fashion advice because his idea of fashion is based off of the TV series Miami Vice. One time he came home from a conference in Austin and was certain that I would look good in a t-shirt tied at the corner and a bandana around my neck. I vetoed it immediately because I have never worn said attire and would never do it since I don’t work in a bar.
And! When we moved in together, I sent many ugly, Cosby sweaters (that he wore in a non-ironic way) to Goodwill.
.-= kirida´s last blog ..a spring baby =-.
Bossy would never seek approval from her husband in this way. Now, seeking the thumbs up from her teenage daughter is another story…
If I wanted my husband’s fashion advice, I would have married a gay man.
.-= Marinka´s last blog ..Fake My Blog! =-.
Ha! So true!
I do take my “now” husband’s opinion into account most of the time. This is his first marriage, only children (2 daughters from my first marriage, 10 & 12); he was 46 when we married.
This man has an EYE for women/girl fashion. Odd, but it saves me time while shopping. He can walk through a store, grab several garments, send me (or one of the daughters) to the dressing room and we leave the store with a great outfit. Works for me, I hate shopping.
We’ve had to compromise on home decor. He likes metal and glass, not exactly child-friendly but I’m glad we don’t have worse issues
that would be so handy to have someone w/that kind of clothing sense. we have that decorating issue too! huh-boy…. my hubs is much more patient on projects, attention to details and all that but he’s from alaska (not known for its fashion!) so i’m not taking much fashion advice. making things, building things, maybe even cooking things, YES.