ooo, your thong is so dangerous! no, seriously.

A part of me (yeah, THAT part) always knew thong underwear was dangerous, and now there’s a lawsuit to prove it.

This Victoria’s Secret litigation raises many questions, such as:

*52-year-olds wear thongs? really? is there no age limit on thong wearing? should there be? (no offense intended. I’m 41 and I wouldn’t go near them! In our house we try to avoid MONSTER WEDGIES, and thongs, by nature, ARE a wedgie, aren’t they?)

*why are there metallic decorative pieces on a thong? I mean, how? where?

*what are ya doing with that thong to make something FLY OFF it and INTO YOUR EYE?

[hey, don’t judge me—home with a feverish Kid leaves me searching for any kind of laugh]

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10 responses to “ooo, your thong is so dangerous! no, seriously.

  1. All of the mental scenarios that case leaves one with are scary….VERY SCARY indeed!

    Oh and I wouldn’t so much as be worried about metallic decorative pieces flying off (altho, yes that does beg the question), as I would be them getting WEDGED into places. Oiy!

  2. Thongs & hemmeroids are NOT compatible !

  3. I thought the same thing when I read that today: who is this 52 year old rockin’ a thong? When I tried to wear one after child #2, child #2 said “mom, those underpants are too small for your butt.”

  4. Lord, another attempt to make the world idiot-proof.

    I don’t know about an age limit, although I think lacy underpants are sexier. But metal pieces? Yikes.

  5. auds, i would worry too about tiny metal pieces near my girlie parts!

    jackie, LOL! maybe the thong could be coated with medicine and help matters….? 😉

    sue, kids are brutally honest, aren’t they?

    citizen, lacy is nice, although a little itchy sometimes, depending.

  6. I have nothing whatsoever to say to this.

  7. and p.s. are you allowed to try on underwear? Bras, I get, but I mean, if you’re wearing other underwear under the thong, doesn’t that affect the fit? So the only way I can see trying it on to see if it fits or not is by barebacking it, and that lends a whole other level of *yuck* to the whole story.

  8. oh, Jim, you DO, you know you DO!

    Jet, this just makes the whole thing get gross.

  9. OMG. I just saw this lady and her lawyer on TV.
    okay 1st. Jet .. she was NOT trying them on. she owed them.. that being said.
    SHE IS NOT THIN.. she is NOT normal weight. and a bit overweight. I’m sorry if your NOT THIN or a Model YOU have NO right wearing a THONG.. a 52 year old african American women who is a bit overweight has NO BUSINESS owning THONGS.. and I HOPE SHE READS THIS!!! .. Just another person trying to dumb down america .. I understand if SHe did get hurt and had to go to the hospital because she CUT her eye etc. But. It’s her own fault. seriously She should NOT be wearing thongs. ewwww ..

  10. I suspect it’s past time for a standard warning to be attached to all products sold in the US:

    “Warning: Sometimes stuff breaks. Use at your own risk.”