Thursday, August 16th, 2007...6:07 am
nebbish \NEB-ish\
noun:
A weak-willed, timid, or ineffectual person.You used to be a nebbish, a noodle, a fool
And now you’re Mr. Big Time with your own private pool.
– Maira Kalman, Max in Hollywood, BabyNebbish is from Yiddish nebekh, “poor, unfortunate,” of Slavic origin.
Time for another word of the day. Isn’t it cute? Guess who is the opposite of a nebbish? That’s right! Kid! (yay for her; boo for me, if ya know what I mean)
I had an interesting conversation with other moms just yesterday about the difficult balance of letting a child be free, independent, and experiencing life on their own, versus scaring common sense into them too much so that you end up with a nebbish. We don’t want to raise a nebbish, but we don’t want to take risks with our child’s life either.
It appears to be a zero-sum game.
Someone is going to be fearful: will it be you or your child?
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7 Comments
August 16th, 2007 at 7:53 am
I aways figured worrying was my job and hers was to jump in the deep end of life, provided she has finished those pesky swim lesson, again my responsibility. I’ve seen a lot of kids who are scared and/or worriers, and usually it seems that a parent who is too much of a worrier imprints it on the kid. Its hard to teach a kid confidence and assertiveness if you don’t have any. Kinda the can’t sell what you don’t own mentality. Which is sad cuz those kids always seem less happy.
August 16th, 2007 at 8:24 am
My kids made me insane AND turned me into a nebbish. I guess there’s not much hope for them in the end, eh?
August 16th, 2007 at 5:43 pm
Always err on the side of letting the kid learn and play and explore and discover for himself or herself.
When I was nine or ten years old, my dad would give me $10 on random Sunday mornings and send me to Seattle on foot by myself to walk around the neighborhoods and look at cool new things I hadn’t seen before. When I got home, he wanted me to write about everything I saw and did.
He saw it as a creative exercise. I saw it as fun and liberating. Neither of us saw it as dangerous.
Almost as bad as constricting a kid out of fear is constricting a kid out of the misguided belief that any unorganized activity is a waste of time. Hence all the soccer leagues, dance lessons, music instruction, stage productions, day camps, church outings, Scouting, blah blah blah that Bainbridge moms are hyper-notorious for.
Enough already, parents. Just let the kid play in the nearest park with the other kids. Or roam the woods by himself or herself. Kids a butterfly. Let them flutter free. That’s what I did, and, all evidence to the contrary, I turned out just flipping fine.
Put the net down, have a decaf latte, take a bath and chill out already.
August 17th, 2007 at 6:49 am
Being a parent is definitely a tough job.
August 17th, 2007 at 9:18 am
Wow, Jim! I’ll go out on a limb and guess no one here is doing that now. Of course, every child is different. Some can be left alone a lot younger than others; some have more common sense and could handle certain outings.
Most importantly, some have a better sense of DIRECTION!! I would have ended up lost in Capitol Hill or something if I wandered alone downtown. I STILL get lost!
August 17th, 2007 at 1:47 pm
Hmmm, in truth, neither of us should be fearful.
Are you asking a trick question?
August 20th, 2007 at 7:59 pm
It’s ALL a trick question, so tricky I have no answer.
I DID just hear someone use this word in a sentence during an interview! “he’s kind of a wimpy, nebbishy guy”
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